Husband V/S Wife

1.
Husband: Do you know the meaning of W I F E? It means, Without Information, Fighting Everytime!
Wife: No darling, it means, With Idiot For Ever

2.
Wife: I wish I was a newspaper, So I'd be in your hands all day.
Husband: I too wish that you were a newspaper, So I could have a new one everyday.

3.
Doctor: Your husband needs rest and peace. Here are some sleeping pills..
Wife: When must I give them to him?
Doctor: They are for you

4.
Wife: I had to marry you to find out how stupid you are.
Husband: You should have known it the minute I asked you to marry me.

5.
Husband: Today is Sunday & I have to enjoy it.. So I bought 3 movie tickets.
Wife: Why Three?
Husband: For you and your parents

6.
Wife: What will you give me if I climb the great Mount Everest ?
Husband: A lovely Push...!!!

7.
Q: What is the most effective way to remember your wife's birthday?
A: Just forget it once and you will never forget it again

8.
After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, :You know, I was a fool when I married you."
The husband replied, "Yes dear, but I was in love and didn't notice.: